My 10-year-old daughter kind of hates me right now. |
During the pandemic, her screen time, like that of many other kids, spiraled out of control. In my defense, my daughter is dyslexic, so it's hard for her to spend long hours reading a book. Still, even as she returned to in-person school and play dates, her screen time didn't drop. Her iPad, which was her constant companion while studying at home, remained at her side; she continued to use it to connect with friends, play games and watch videos. Once released, it was hard to put that tech genie back in the bottle, and I'll confess: I stopped trying. |
Over time, I noticed that she became less and less interested in playing with her friends offline. She had a shorter attention span. She used to love to watch longer scripted series like "The Owl House," with actual characters and a narrative arc — but started fighting to watch TikTok or YouTube Shorts instead. When I would forbid it, she would point out my own habit of mindlessly scrolling at any interstitial moment, staring at a screen while waiting in line at the grocery store or cooking at home. |
She was right. Our devices had invaded every part of our lives. |
Then, a few weeks ago, I interviewed the 17-year-old Logan Lane. Lane grew up as what she calls a "screenager." But during the pandemic she did what the rest of us did not: Instead of leaning into her smartphone, she ditched it and is convincing others to do the same. |
After talking to Lane about her transformation, I had a conversation with my daughter and told her that I was worried about our collective screen time. I've long known the many dangers of social media and phone use for teens. But it was my time with Lane that convinced me to ration my family's devices. |
I'd love to tell you that my daughter has enthusiastically embraced her tech-limited life. She told me when I first suggested it: "Mom, never gonna happen." But at least now she's working with her dad in the evenings on a papier-mâché sculpture. And I'm putting my phone away after work so I can engage with her instead of getting pulled into the virtual world at the sound of a ping. It might not be enough, and it might not last, but it is a start. |
This is what I recommend: Gather your family and listen to this episode together. Maybe on a laptop or a smart speaker? It's got lessons for every generation. |
What Our Readers Are Saying |
I have always said that someday Gen Z — my girls are 13 and 17 — will reject all this technology and discover what their parents (if they are Gen X, like me) grew up with — boredom and freedom. — Stephanie, Rhode Island My son really wanted to ditch his smartphone last year, but his college accounts required phone apps. Then he got a lifeguard job that required him to use an app to log his hours. Now he is a volunteer fireman, and if he doesn't have his phone on he won't hear the app that announces fire calls. It's not just a willpower thing, unfortunately. — Trudy, Bucks County, Pa. A wake-up call for everyone, beautifully described by a Brooklyn teenager who dumped her phone and discovered the joy of real life. Her three-year experience has given her confidence, independence, greater focus, better sleep, ability to turn off daily politics and more general awareness of what's important in life. I plan to follow her lead. — Tom J., Berwyn, Ill. |
The Teenager Leading the Smartphone Liberation Movement |
 | | Scott Rossi for The New York Times |
|
Here's what we're focusing on today: |
| Exclusive for Subscribers | | |
Forward this newsletter to friends to share ideas and perspectives that will help inform their lives. They can sign up here. Do you have feedback? Email us at opiniontoday@nytimes.com. |
|
No comments:
Post a Comment