Saturday, September 9, 2023

Opinion Today: How to solve the loneliness epidemic

America can take some cues from Britain, where social experiments are bringing people out of isolation.

Social isolation is the rare malady whose cure is fully known and costs relatively little, yet is still so difficult to achieve.

Carlos Chavarría
Author Headshot

By Nicholas Kristof

Opinion Columnist

Loneliness is puzzling. We evolved to be social creatures, but as we become richer our impulse is to seek privacy in our homes — maybe behind a protective layer of hedges. Instead of an extended family crowded together in a shared space, we inhabit our own bedrooms — and then, to afford this lifestyle, we work such long hours that we have no time for group meals or hanging out with friends. No wonder a majority of Americans report being lonely.

We're also learning that loneliness is deadly. It is linked to strokes, heart disease, dementia, inflammation and suicide. The surgeon general of the United States warns that loneliness is as deadly as smoking 15 cigarettes a day, and more dangerous than obesity.

An epidemic of loneliness is striking the entire developed world, but there are solutions. Britain is helping to lead the way, having appointed a minister for loneliness in 2018. In my most recent column, I wrote about the lessons I learned from a trip to England.

This piece is part of a series I'm writing this year called "How America Heals," which aims to move beyond what we normally do in journalism — point out problems — and leapfrog ahead to solutions.

Britain, for example, has created "chatty benches," where people are encouraged to sit down and start a conversation with anyone else sitting there. There are also "talking cafes," where you're encouraged to speak with other coffee drinkers. And "libraries of things," where neighbors lend their camping gear or tools to one another and form bonds in the process. The British have organized local nature walks, songwriting workshops and volunteer litter pickups that get people out of isolation. The scale is impressive: Some six million people in Britain volunteered on a single day in May for "The Big Help-Out."

The United States can learn from these experiments. Americans, atomized and polarized, addicted and distressed, are a lonely crowd. For the sake of our happiness and well-being, we need one another, and I hope you'll find my column helpful in illuminating a path forward. So check it out and, er, consider chatting about it with a friend.

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